ITS ME,MALIK!!

Monday, January 22, 2007

-> patience <-

patience my son..
i'm feeling freaky..
feel like a tissue..
once used up, i'm gone..
seriously..
what's happening to me..?
why is life so unfair..?
i know life is never fair..
but fallen, fell again..
i'm going downhill man..!
i may seem happy..
but nobody..
i mean NOBODY understands me..
NOBODY knows what's happening in me..
not even the special someone..
not even parents..
not even shane, my good friend..
not even irwan, my childhood friend..
not even ANYONE!!
life's a bummer..

i am explosive nowadays..
i feel like shit..
i'm just hoping someone would care bout me..
but nah..
i'm going thru shit ALONE..
nobody to share with..
nobody to get comfort with..
totally nobody by my side..

what's more, i've been waiting and waiting..
no reply..
i don't feel special..
perhaps i'm not..
i aint handsome..
i aint smart..
i aint a nice person to be with..
i am just too dumb to realise things..
just good at blabbering and making people angry..
and at the same time, getting stepped on over and over again..
u can repeat that again and again..
and wow my height is 1.8m but then i feel so short..
that's if u guys even understand me..

i'm speechless..
i'm hopeless..
i'm whatever crappy shit u wanna call me..
cause u know what, i feel what my sis feels now..
i feel like crying but i don't cry..
i feel broken inside out..
nobody notices..
is there a knife anywhere..?
maybe i should start repenting..
probably at the age of 30, i will be on the headlines..
"Male, aged 30, stabbed himself and bled to death.."
how amazing..

i've been having loadsa patience..
am i not doing enough..?
maybe i should shut myself up..

that's it..
keeping quiet for a long time..
if anyone wants to contact me, find me @ msn..
i think i will be online most of the time..
since i will be at home after school/soccer/work..
just gonna slack @ home hoping to find peace there..
this is such a long entry..

well, keeping quiet starts now..
if u don't see me online, sms me lah..92203439..
ciao..

"your life is very short.."
"live life to the fullest.."
"don't be like me hanging on a thread.."
"make loadsa friends.."
"appreciate them.."

"i'm just a FRIEND..."

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4:33:00 am
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